May 22, 2011

Sew Mama Sew Giveaway Time!

I'm super excited to be part of this giveaway again this time around! Last time I was lucky enough to win two prizes as well as give a lovely family some sweet little hair flowers! This time however, I know what you really want and it's not flowers! I'm giving you something really fantastic.... I'm offering up some fabric from my stash!!

Lucky winner gets a half yard of:

Yup! That's Amy Butlers Soul Blossoms Passion Lilly in Mulberry!

They will also receive a collection of other fabrics that I have stashed around in my shelves but I'd rather ask them what they like to sew before I randomly pull things! Do you like flannel? Cottons to quilt with? Let me know! HINT: You'll love what I have stashed away because I'm a Michael Miller fanatic!

Here's how to enter:

1. Fan me on Facebook
2. Follow me on this blog
3. Leave a comment below telling me you did those two things (if you are not on facebook just follow my blog!) and tell me a funny joke because my husband is going to pick the winner based on the best joke!


Edited to add: This closes at MIDNIGHT on THURSDAY the 26th, 2011! I'll announce the winner sometime on the 27th :)

Edited to add again...  Sorry if you could not comment! I have fixed my comment settings and it should allow you to comment now if you don't have a google/blogger account. If you are an anonymous user, make sure to include your email address so I can let you know if you've won! I'll extend my deadline by an extra date so you can still get in on the fabrics!!!


  1. I'm a fan and a follower!!! The only joke I hear (and I hear it all day long from Penelope and Adelaide) is this! :)
    Knock, knock
    Who's there?
    Banana who?
    Knock, knock
    Who's there?
    Banana who?
    Knock, knock
    Orange who?
    Orange you glad I didn't say banana?!

  2. ok - I am not sure if I'm to leave three comments or one? I am a follower of your blog and a fan on FB.

    My Joke:
    A man found a bottle on the beach and he rubbed it. A genie appeared in a cloud of smoke. “What do you wish, master?” The man thought a while and since he and his wife were having some problems he said, “Make my wife love me as much as the day we were married.” Immediately the genie turned him into a pile of fat quarters.”

  3. Count me in please! that fabric is So very yummy. I love to make toys and dolls quilts for charity, so flannel is Awesome. Blogging is so much fun.

  4. Done both!

    Why did the chicken... nevermind!
    An atom stumbles and falls. His friend asks if he is already. "No! I have lost an electron!" cries the fallen ion. Are you sure asks his friend? "I'm positive!" shrieks the atom.

  5. Mmmm lush fabric, I like you on facebook and follow your blog. Q: What's brown and sticky? A A stick!

  6. I am a FB fan and follow your blog! Fabric...I mostly sew with cotton quilting fabric, and adore Michael Miller!, that is hard! I immediately am tempted to tell a filthy joke, but that is probably not appropriate. So, here is a clean one:
    What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh!

  7. i will fan you and follow you...I quilt and I love mm fabrics.

    What do you get when you play a country song backwards?

    You get your wife back, your dog back, your house back, you get out of prison lol...(i could keep going)

  8. An alien walks into a bar and pokes the bartender on the shoulder, the bartender turns around and says "What can I get you?" But the alien just stands here, silent, so the bartender turns back around to help other customers. The alien pokes him on the shoulder again and the bartender turns around and says, "That's annoying, stop!" and turns back around. The alien reaches out and pokes him on the shoulder again and the bartender turns around and says, "Look here, fella, if you poke me one more time I'm gonna shoot your balls off!" and he turns back around. Sure enough, the alien reaches out and pokes him on the shoulder yet again. The bartender turns around with a loaded shotgun and aims it at the alien's crotch, "Holy Hell, man! Where are your balls?!" the bartender asks, "How do you reproduce?!" The alien pokes him on the shoulder.

  9. PS- don't count this comment, but I follow and liked you.

  10. I am a follower! I am no good at jokes so no chance of me winning.

  11. G'Day! I'm here for the Sew, Mama, Sew Giveaway Day! Please visit me, too:

    Homemaker Honey
    homemakerhoney @gmail .com

  12. thank you for the giveaway :D I'm not on FB, but I did become a follower :)

    Okay, so two cannibals are eating a clown. One cannibal looks at the other cannibal and asks, "does this taste a little funny to you?"

    senjosuki at yahoo

  13. Thanks for the giveaway!
    If girls with big boobs work at Hooters, where do girls with peg legs work?

  14. So I just become a facebook fan! Love your blog, I love Michael Miller too! I just bought the Amy Butler book for sewing bags, I'm so inspired and excited to get started, this would be perfect: K, here is my joke:

    "Well, there was this blonde who was sick and tired of all the blonde jokes. So one evening she went home and memorized all the state capitals.

    Back in the office the next day, some guy started telling a dumb blonde joke. She interrupted him with a shrill announcement,

    "I've had it up to here with these blonde jokes. I want you to know that this blonde went home last night and did something probably none of you could do...I memorized all the state capitals."

    One of the guys, of course, said "I don't believe you. What is the capital of Nevada?"

    "N", she answered.

  15. I am following. I love to make bags and small purses, etc. with bright, bold cotton!

    Did you hear about the kidnapping in South Dakota?
    It's OK now. He woke up.

  16. I follow your blog and good luck to your husband. These are cracking me up!!

  17. I love sewing with cottons. Well, rather, I don't like anything slippery. I like fleece pretty well, anything laminate, etc... I do not like linen or anything that requires fancy care. I shall be a college student next year.

    I have a FB but I read blogs more than I'm on FB so I'm following on google reader instead.

    My joke...
    what do you call a deer with no eyes? No-eye-deer.
    What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs?
    Still no-eye deer! Hehe

  18. Okay, so I'm now following you on FB and following your blog! I'm hoping that your husband is like mine and will enjoy this joke! :)

    Ole and Sven went hunting in the woods and Ole took of to find a tree because he had to "drop a deuce" (cleaning this up a little!)

    It was taking him a long time so he decided to just rest up against a tree and he promptly fell asleep!

    Sven came along to check on him and thought it would be funny to play a prank on poor Ole. So he took the deer guts from the deer he just shot and put them under Ole so that he would think he pooped his guts out and he went back to camp.

    About 30 minutes later Ole comes walking back into camp and says, "Oh Sven! You'll never believe what happened to me! I was taking a dump in the wood and I fell asleep but when I woke up I saw that I had pooped my guts out!"

    To which Sven replied, "NO! You don't say, that's terrible!"

    "Yeah," Ole said, "but don't worry I found a sharp stick and poked 'em all back up there!"

    Okay...I know, that was disgusting! But I don't know a man on Earth that doesn't love that joke!

  19. I am a fan of your FB page and I am now following your blog :)

    Okay, my favorite riddle is this:

    A man is driving on a lone highway when his car breaks down. It starts pouring rain and he has no phone on him, so he squints into the distance and sees a small church. Leaving his broken car behind, he walks for a long time before arriving at the church - soaked. He knocks on the door and a nun answers, and he asks her, "May I have a place to stay? My car broke down way out back and it's raining." The nun sighed and said, "My boss does not allow men in our church to stay." With a pleading look on his face, "Just for one night? I'll clean up after myself - I promise." The nun sighed again and nodded, showed him the way to the room accompanied with a bathroom and left him there. The next morning, he was gone without a word. Later that day the nun's boss checked the room and came back livid, "There was a man here last night."

    How did the boss find out?

    rachaelroyce [at] gmail [dot] com ;)


  20. I so appreciate your giveaway! I'm a new sewer, so cottons are really the only thing I know how to do -- upholstery weight is always good, too, for bags.

    My favorite joke of all time Q: How do you know if an elephant has been in your bathroom? A: The towel with the big E on it is wet.

  21. Follow your blog but I don't do the FB thing.

    My only joke:

    what do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?

    Elliphino (ell-if-I-know)

  22. I'm a fan and a follower.
    My joke is:
    What did the girl mushroom say to the boy mushroom?

    Gee, you're a fun guy (fungi)

  23. I'm a new follower! I hope you are from the South or you might not like this too much ;)

    What do you call a pretty girl up north? A visitor :)

  24. I'm a follower and a liker.

    Does your hubby love bad vampire movies? We just watched one. He'll love this joke if he watch it:
    'Maybe she's a robot" Response 'No I know she's not because she touched my cheek'.

    See my fella is laughing too much!

  25. I'm a fan/follower with no cahance of winner because I can never remeber any jokes!

  26. I am a follower and a Fb fan.
    I love one liners

    Q.) How many psychiatrists does it take to change a lightbulb?

    A.) One, but it takes years and years, and the lightbulb really has to want to change.

    one more.
    3 guys walk into a bar and the 4th one ducks. (that one is a knee slapper!)

    Plus, I don't get the deer joke. Oh well!

  27. Ok....I'm not too good at jokes, but I'll try:

    A magician was driving down the road..then he turned into a drive way...

    Thanks for the chance!

  28. Not on facebook, but a follower!

    Knock Knock
    Who's there?
    Cotton Who?
    Cotton a trap
    Must buy more


  29. I love sewing with quilting cottons! And I'm a follower with Google Reader. My joke:

    Q: What's the difference between a bra-less woman and a sewing machine?
    A: The sewing machine has only one bobbin.

  30. I'm a follower but I don't facebook. Thanks
    Knock, knock,
    Who's there
    Boo who
    Grandma, why are you crying?
    Lame, I know, but my 4 year old grandson rolls on the ground every time. And he asks me every day!

  31. follower and like you on FB- amorette d. i like to quilt in modern fabrics and patterns and make softies!

    (from dane cook) I'm watching some television tonight. I'm watching The Discovery Channel. You know, this channel, you never ever plan on watching this. It just happens. You're flickin' around, all of a sudden -- boom -- you're watching a mole for an hour-and-a-half.

    asdrexler at gmail dot com

  32. Sorry I don't follow on facebook, but I do follow your blog now.

    Since it'll be your husband picking the winner, I guess he might enjoy an edgier joke than my usual Laffy Taffy style joke.

    A man is walking across the beach and sees this tragic lady with no arms and no legs. She cries to him, "My life is so sad. I have no arms, no legs, and I've never been dancing." So, he bends down and dances with her. She stops crying for a second but then cries out, "My life is so sad. I have no arms, no legs, and I've never been kissed." So, he bends down and kisses her. She stops crying for a second but then cries out, "My life is so sad. I have no arms, no legs, and I've never had sex." So, he bends down, throws her in the ocean, and yells, "Well, you're screwed now!"

  33. I follow your blog! What does an Italian Chef call his brand-new restaurant venture? Pastabilities.

  34. Followed & Liked!

    I'm not sure this will win me anything-- I tend to not be a joke teller. However, I have a penchant for really dumb jokes, so this is my favorite:

    Why do seagulls fly by the sea?
    Because if they flew by the bay, they'd be bay-gulls!




  35. Hello,
    I am following you, like you on FB and here is my joke.

    A newlywed couple moves into their new house. One day the husband comes home from work and his wife says, "Honey, you know, in the upstairs bathroom one of the pipes is leaking, could you fix it?" The husband says, "What do I look like, Mr. Plumber?" A few days go by, and he comes home from work and his wife says, "Honey, the car won't start. I think it needs a new battery. Could you change it for me?" He says: "What do I look like, Mr. Goodwrench?" Another few days go by, and it's raining pretty hard. The wife finds a leak in the roof. She says, "Honey, there's a leak on the roof! Can you please fix it?" He says, "What do I look like, Bob Vila?" The next day the husband comes home, and the roof is fixed. So is the plumbing. So is the car. He asks his wife what happened. "Oh, I had a handyman come in and fix them," she says. "Great! How much is that going to cost me?" he snarls. Wife says: "Nothing. He said he'd do it for free if I either baked him a cake or slept with him." "Uh, well, what kind of cake did you make?" asks the husband. "What do I look like," she says, "Betty Crocker?"

  36. oooooh Michael Miller... excuse me, I need to wipe some drool from my chin.

    Okay, better now. I follow you and like you on Facebook.

    Here is my joke:

    Do you know what you hear when you play a Justin Beiber song backwards? Satanic messages.

    What's worse though, is when you play it forwards, you hear a Justin Beiber song. :)

  37. I follow therough Google Reader.
    Can a pun please count as a joke?...
    A dog gave birth to some puppies near the side of the road. She was cited for littering.
    A hole was found in the wall of a nudist camp. Thae police are looking into it.

    jacquelinelockhart10 (at) gmail (dot) com

  38. I am now a happy follower - but I don't FB! Here is my attempt at a is actually true life.
    When my hubby and I were first married, we lived in a tiny cabin. When winter came, we realized that we were sharing our cabin with mice, chipmunks, and other critters who wanted "in" from the cold. (I only minded snakes, and my hubby didn't care for the bat who got in, and when the wood stove warmed things up, the bat relaxed and fell onto hubby's pillow, right in front of his nose.) Back to my story - one night I went into the kitchen and looked in the bread box for the last slice of yummy raisin bread. Gone! I went to hubby with a concerned look on my face and said that the mice were getting much smarter: one must have crept to the bread box and (here I acted it out, too) pushed up the lid with his little paws, to get that bread. My hubby's eyes got wide, and he said "You're kidding....we have to get a trap!" (Remember, we were just married - he didn't know my teasing very well.) Well, I grinned then and couldn't keep it up, and told him I knew it was him that got the bread! I had him going for a minute, tho!
    Jacque in SC

  39. Just became a follower, and I don't do fb:)

    My 4 year olds favorite joke is: Ready for the longest story ever... Once upon a time, the end!

    Then he giggles and giggles and tells it again:)

  40. Ok. I am a follower.

    Here is the best joke I could come up with....

    A guy walked into a bar and immediately noticed a young lady at the bar on her own. After a couple of drinks, he decided to offer her a drink and make small talk.
    "What's your name?" he asked.
    "Carmen," she replied.
    "That's a nice name," he said. "Did your mother or father name you that?"
    "Neither," she said. "I changed my name when I was 18 from Sharon to Carmen."
    "Why did you do that?" he asked.
    "Well," she explained, "I like men and I like cars, so that is how I got my name. What's your name?"
    "Beertits," the man replied.


  41. Hi there, I am a new follower and I have 'Like'd you on FB.

    Here's my joke: Why does Snoop Dogg always carry an umbrella?

    Answer: For Drizzle

    (okay, if you aren't a Snoop Dogg fan you probably won't get it. But I thought it was funny. ;) )

  42. I love to quilt with cotton.
    knock knock
    who's there
    shamp who...
    sorry my daughter loves knock knock jokes and someone already used our favorite banana and orange one

  43. A newly married Irish couple was in a terrible accident where the woman's face was severely burned.

    The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft the skin from her body, so the husband offered to donate some of his own skin.

    However, the only skin on his body that the doctor found suitable would have to come from his rear end.

    The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was a very delicate matter.

    After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the woman's new beauty. She looked more beautiful than she ever had before! All her friends and relatives just went on and on about her youthful beauty!

    One day, she was alone with her husband, and she was overcome with emotion at his sacrifice..

    She said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. There is no way I could ever repay you."

    "My darling," he replied," think nothing of it.. I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek."
    thanks for the chance to win! hope you like the joke :-)
    I am making a bottled rainbow quilt and am looking for colorful cottons... thanks for blogging and for the giveaway

  44. 1.What did the pistachio say to a comedian ?
    You "crack me up"
    2 What do you call the bear with no teeth ?
    Gummy Bear
    3.A horse walks into a bar and the bartender said "Why the long face?"
    4.How do you make Lady Gaga cry?
    Poker face

  45. I'm following you on both facebook and google reader thingy!

    A Tour Bus Carrying ugly people was involved in a head on collision, and everyone on the bus died. When the group got to heaven to heaven, God came and told them "Since you have all endured such hardships in life with your looks, I will grant you each one wish. ." He goes to the first person in line and asked " Whats your wish?" the girl said " i want to be beautiful." bam she became beautiful. the second guy in line step up and says " I want to be Beautiful" bam hes beautiful and then the next and the next. by the time got half way down the line the last guy is just laughing away. By the time god made it to him he was rolling on the ground laughing, he finally calmed down enough where he could speak. God asked him " What is your one wish?" HE looked up chuckling and said......................

    Make them all ugly again"

    Thanks for hosting this giveaway!
    lafenwick @

  46. I follow you in my google reader. Anyway I have a joke. My husbands favorite joke is "Where does a pirate get a drink? A BaarrRRRRR. How does a pirate get to work? A CaRRRRRR



  47. Ok, this was the top joke in Australia...

    This woman rushed to see her doctor, looking very much worried and all strung out. She rattles off: “Doctor, take a look at me. When I woke up this morning, I looked at myself in the mirror and saw my hair all wiry and frazzled up, my skin was all wrinkled and pasty, my eyes were bloodshot and bugging out, and I had this corpse-like look on my face! What's WRONG with me, Doctor!?”

    The doctor looks her over for a couple of minutes, then calmly says: “Well, I can tell you that there ain't nothing wrong with your eyesight....”

  48. pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his pants. bartender says, "hey what's with the steering wheel?" pirate goes, "arr, she's driving me nuts!"

    and, i'm following you and a fan. great giveaway, thanks!

  49. What a great giveaway! Here's my joke (found on

    The quilter died and went up to the Pearly Gates. (It doesn’t start well, but it gets better….)  There, she was faced with a choice:  she had lived her life so that she could either go to Heaven, or Hell – her choice.  She was pretty sure this would have all been decided by now, and she was pretty sure where she wanted to go, but she was also a very curious quilter.

    She asked Saint Peter if she could just take a look at what might be awaiting her in Hell.

    They entered a huge room (anyone ever been to the Houston Quilt Festival?  Bigger than that!), with tables and chairs.  There were quite a few pleasant looking quilters sitting everywhere.  But it was what was in the middle of each table that caught her attention:  a wonderful huge pile of fabric.  She thought she’d died and gone to Heaven!!!
    She made up her mind on the spot, and turned to Saint Peter: “I know that Heaven is probably very nice, but I’ve decided that I want to stay here, thank you.”

    As the door closed quietly behind him for all eternity, everyone at the tables turned to her with a smile on their faces and said, with one voice:
    “Did you bring the needles?”

    sleepachu at hotmail dot com

  50. I'm also a new follower on your blog (I don't have Facebook). :)

    sleepachu at hotmail dot com

  51. I'm a fan and a follower! OK, I am almost embarrassed to admit that any time I pull this on someone I laugh almost to the point of tears.

    Me: Knock Knock

    Unsuspecting person: Who's there

    Me: Smell Mop

    Unsuspecting Person: Smell Mop Who?

    (Say it again a bit faster if you're not sure)

  52. Okie dokie, I'm a newbie follower with google and fb! And here's the joke I found on CleanJokes4U (sorry don't like the dirty ones):

    A new super high tech grocery store recently opened in Orlando, Florida. It has the standard automatic water misters to keep the produce fresh, but just before it mists, one hears the distant sound of thunder and the smell of fresh rain. When one passes the diary freezer, you hear cows mooing and experience the scent of fresh mown hay. Going in the meat department one can smell the aroma of charcoal grilled steaks and barbecued ribs. When you pass the fresh eggs case, you hear hens cluck and cackle, and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of morning eggs and bacon. In the bread department, a tantalizing smell of fresh baked bread and soft warm rolls. But I don't buy my toilet paper there any more.

    Pretty good, right?! I got a kick out of it. Thanks for the great giveaway!

  53. Love the fabric!! :)


    A horse walks into a bar & the bartender says, "why the long face?".

    Bahahaha!!! ;) Just kidding.... obviously I'm not good at jokes, but thought I'd throw a groaner out there anyways. ;)

  54. I did those two things! Okay, here's the best joke I've got....wait for it.....

    4 potatoes are sitting at a bar; how do you know which one’s the prostitute?
    It’s wearing a sticker that reads, I-DA-HO!

    I love that one!!!!!

  55. Okay, here is my joke:
    A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the Mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.
    She says, 'What's the story?'
    He replies, 'Just crap in the carburetor'
    She asks, 'How often do I have to do that?Hope your husband likes blonde jokes!

    I am a follower of your blog. Thanks for the chance to win!

  56. I fanned you on FB, and I'm following.

    I have three small children and have no memory for things such as jokes (that's a joke in itself hubby winner picker). Speaking of picker, I did just remember a joke I heard at Disneyworld, or is it Land (see above deficit in memory). Anyway, at the Monsters Inc Joke factory, they told this joke. I only remember it because my 3 and 5 year old repeat it daily.

    How do you make a tissue dance.

    You put a little boogie in it.

    stayathomelibrarian at gmail dot com

  57. I am a follower. Joke from my 5 year old son....what kind of key can open a banana?

    A monkey!

    Have a good day!

  58. I follow you on FB and your blog. I like flannels( I am in the middle of a rag quilt) and I like cottons. I want to make a snoem.wball quilt.
    I just know knock knock jokes from my children's childhood.I am sure your husband doesn't want to hear any of them.

  59. Apparently I need to read more blogs on the SMS giveaway, my rear end has NOT flattened. (disappointed sigh). I just liked you on Facebook and follow your blog. Now here's my joke dilemma. It's a groaner. It's from my husband. But, if you laugh, I'll take the credit. Here goes:
    Why does a chicken coupe have only 2 doors?

    Because if it had 4, it would be a chicken sedan.

    (insert the sound of crickets!)

  60. I'm a follower & fb fan.
    I'd love some quiltinf cottons!

    A guy walks into the psychiatrist's office wearing nothing but saran wrap. the psychiatrist say's "I can clearly see your nuts".
    Karen P.

  61. Hello from Canada! I don't know what's going on but the "followers" section of several blogs aren't showing for my this aft. I may already be a follower from the fall, I know you were in my favorites list! :) But I "like" you on FB now too! Normally I only have 3yo jokes to repeat (knock knock... who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say watermelon?...... he'll get it right someday) but I heard this one this week and thought it was great:

    They opened up Beethoven's grave, and they found him sitting up, with all of his musical masterpieces around him. And he was erasing them! They were all, "BEETHOVEN! What are you DOING?" And he goes, "I'm decomposing."

    Thanks for this chance! Love the fabric!

  62. What an interesting giveaway! Love the jokes...

    Why do squirrels swim on their backs?
    To keep their nuts dry!

    Ha Ha

    I am a facebook fan (Carla Geates) and I will subscribe to your blog in a reader once the followers section comes back up - it's just blank? Thanks for a chance to win!


I love comments and appreciate you taking the time to leave me one! Have a wonderful day! xox